Re-evaluation of Life Principles Impacting the People & Relationships I Attract

<<Please refer to the scriptures quoted>>

1.     It's Not My Fault

You have been pushed, beaten and broken. You may even feel like someone is after you, and they’re using all avenues to access and apply pressure your breaking points. NEWSFLASH! Once you try to do good there will always be- in the darkness- the enemy lurking closely, looking for an open door in our lives to do destruction. For this reason we are called to war- not in the flesh, but in the spirit- “for the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down strongholds… (2 Corinthians 10:4 KJV)”

What are your weapons of warfare? Your Praise. The Old Testament details this distinctively in Judges 20. Named after the twelve sons of Jacob (later renamed Israel), the tribes experienced a war amongst them- Benjamin had committed a crime and the remaining eleven tribes were to purge the evil from their midst. They inquired if the Lord: ‘“Which tribe shall go first to attack the people of Benjamin?” The Lord answered, “Judah (literal Hebrew translation meaning praise) is to go first.”’(Judges 20:18 NLT) Of course, they were victorious as there was a remnant of 600 men (initially) from Benjamin who had escaped- out of an army exceeding 25,000.

Even after you are encouraged to war with praise (and maybe even further into spiritual warfare/intercession), you must ensure that you put on the whole armor of God that you may be able to resist the enemy and that he may flee from you. (Ephesians 6:10-17)

------This is just one side of the coin, now time to flip over to the next side------

2.     It's ALL My Fault

In other cases, we are quick to place blame on people and the enemy for the consequences of our own sin, our own iniquities. Unfortunately we are too ignorant to even admit our faults to God; remain blinded by our own sin and therefore leave a gateway for the devourer to destroy our lives. Always remember that we will be judged accordingly (Romans 2:1-8), so stop judging others according to your sin! Instead, ask God to show you your sin, and teach you to change your ways to His (Psalm 139: 23-24). Truth be told, we are all sinners (Romans 3:10) and sometimes though the better part of us desires change, we find ourselves falling back into the old habits that we are used to. It is here that the scripture “the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” is evidenced. Who else but Paul could have summed it all up nicely in Romans 7:14-25? Yet still, he did not let it (his sin) deter him from pressing towards the mark of excellence (Philippians 3:12-16)

-----With that said, it is now time to evaluate your life & relationships----

Who are the people that you have in or have a tendency to attract in your life? And what role do they play in your quest to become more Christ-like? Let us look at a case by case basis accompanied by some relevant questions where necessary to assist you in your analysis. What do you expect from your:

a.      Boyfriend/ Girlfriend?

This area is extremely crucial as it represents one of the top reasons why some may walk towards or away from Christ; especially as there is a tendency to open up more to him/her than you would your friends and family (based on a rule of thumb). Hence the bible urges to “Guard your heart, as it determines the course of your life” (Proverbs 4:23). Please read Ephesians 5:21-32; and ponder on the following:

i.                    Is my boyfriend/girlfriend God-fearing?

ii.                  Is he/she submitted to Christ and has a relationship with Him?

iii.                (Question for the ladies) Is he one I would want to submit to?

iv.                Why? Why not?

v.                  Does he treat me (body, mind, heart) as God’s Holy temple (without spot or blemish, without sin)?

vi.                Does he/she honor me by honoring God’s law?

vii.              Does he/she push me towards Christ or away from Christ?

viii.            Has my relationship with Christ grown, since I allowed him/her into my life?

ix.                (Using the answers of the from the previous questions) Is he/she my husband/wife?

The final question is particularly important, because the boyfriend/girlfriend you are dating should be your eventual spouse. Otherwise, he/she is occupying valuable space in your life, making things more complicated to deal with (soul ties, pain, hurt, rejection), in the journey to discovering your true Adam/Eve. Do not allow “spare tires” to occupy the place of your spouse. Confused about who is your Adam/Eve? “Seek God’s kingdom first and His righteousness and all these things shall be added to you.” (Matthew 6:33)

NB: It is ok to love people from a distance!

b.      Family, Friends and Colleagues?

Though some of us may not have that ‘significant other’, there are still unhealthy relationships that we maintain but cripple the walk with Christ. These proverbs are of no unfamiliarity, I am sure: ‘Birds of a feather flock together’ and ‘Show me your friends and I will show you who you are’. By no means am I implying that we should not interact with others nor do we need others to help us. After all, “every joint must supply” and Christ did not come to bring Good News to the (just the) saved but to the unsaved that you would have life and have it more abundantly (John 10:10). And you are commissioned to spread the Good News to the world. This message is to simply state: “Be careful as to who you allow in your inner circle/court.” Answer these questions pertaining to your family, friends and colleagues:

i.                    Are they God-fearing?

ii.                  Do they have a relationship with Christ?

iii.                Do they honor and respect my relationship with Christ by the way they speak to and about me?

iv.                Are they bearers of (spiritual) fruit? (Galatians 5:22-23)

v.                  Has my relationship with Christ grown since I have allowed them into my life?

vi.                The saying goes ‘People are in our lives for a reason, season or lifetime.’ Therefore are those who are there for a reason or season, become those whom I hold on to, hoping that they would stick around for a lifetime? Are those who are there for a season or lifetime, the very ones that I have dismissed as being in my life for a reason? Confused? Pray and ask God to show you the people who are within the category of ‘reason’, ‘season’ or ‘lifetime’; teach you to let go of those not befitting of the current category they are in and to help you put them in the right category.

vii.              Are they dream crushers or dream realizers? Will they push me towards my God given destiny?

REMEMBER not every person is worth sharing a dream with- especially when their selfish motives hinder your ability to achieve those dreams and land you in hot water. Recall Joseph’s story in Genesis 37? He spoke too soon in sharing his dreams with his brothers, and their ignorance led to him being consequently sold into slavery.

There are many questions worth asking, but I leave them up to you, to ask and answer. My advice would be that you write down the answers (and possibly, the questions) listed prior and review them. Pray first, that you may answer the questions honestly and without bias. Finally, when you are done answering, pray and seek God in resolving the best way to let go of those who threaten your relationship with Him and hold on to or discover those who push you towards Him.

Sometimes the things that bring you great pain in letting go, also hold the key to receiving your greatest breakthrough. What are you having trouble letting go of?

I pray that you received revelation and insight on this God-instructed piece, and that you are encouraged now more than ever, to continue pressing towards the mark of excellence.

God loves you- INSPITE OF! Be blessed!

DE-TANGLING CHRISTIANITY FROM THE CONTRADICTIONS OF A HYPOCRITICAL WORLD

A two-week old morning article entitled "International Cycling Union strips Lance Armstrong of 7 Tour de France titles" (Link: http://t.co/f8MB9g4J) caught my attention. I have been absorbing a few glimpses of this story, and those of us who are familiar with it understand this:

 

Following the claims of doping by fellow/former teammates and more vehemently the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency (USADA), Lance Armstrong filed a suit against the former determined to fight to salvage his brand (his name), reputation and along with all the titles and medals he obtained throughout. Then the- need I say- inevitable happened. Lance Armstrong announced he would stop fighting the claims; and the USADA (amongst other accusatory parties) declared this action as an indirect admission of doping. Without due process of the law, and a declaration of “overwhelming evidence” (yet to be released to the public) USADA has taken the drastic step mentioned in the opening line and now- like the Marion Jones and Tiger Woods of 2012- Lance Armstrong is reaping the harvest of a media-cultivated and watered scandal; and a brand devoid of sponsors. If you asked me, this scenario completely contradicts the American oft-boasted about legal phrase “Innocent until proven guilty” and violates the Fifth Amendment of the U.S. Constitution Bill of Rights (Due Process):

“No person shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise infamous crime, unless on a presentment or indictment of a Grand Jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the Militia, when in actual service in time of War or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offence to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation. (Bill of Rights, 2011)”

This represents a classical example of the hypocrisies of the complex system- in such instance the judicial- governing the affairs of the people and society over which it is meant to direct. But how does this affect us Christians, especially if we are supposed to be a product of a different legislation? Well, besides the fact that we co-exist with our brothers under a common system of natural law and our living is affected by its components, we are commonly called to a faith-based defense against the logistics of the physical laws and claims of alleged plaintiffs.

As we are strategically placed in influential positions within the differing spheres[1] of leadership, to impact change and we are obligated to abide by laws and regulations already implemented and enforced, especially if we are to gradually climb the ladder to such position that permits our input in the guidelines shaping the operation and employee relationships with respects to the internal and external environment. But our God is so good, that He leaves no area untouched as each sphere is complimentary and in some ways, hierarchical- all leading back to the ultimate law- His Word especially as He understands law of higher authority overrides that of lower authority. In the meantime, we must abide by the laws of the land.

So, what happens or what do you do when these laws contradict your beliefs and God’s law? I have gathered a few solutions to managing these trials as they arise. (Please feel free to leave your own opinions or additions in the comment box below)

a.       NEVER compromise God’s Law in favor of the world’s law- if analyzed closely, this falls in line with the first Commandment of the Word. Some work environment rules seem to be disguised or rather- those for whom the law was made- there is a deliberate “misinterpretation” of the specified rule(s) for undefined reasons. Some of these reasons may be to obtain/maintain favorability with colleagues and employers or avoid risk of being fired. But Christians must remember (their) true identity does not lie in the favor of man but it always spurs from the finding favor with God first. Remember 2 Tim. 3:12: “Yes, and everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution.” As far as democracy goes, you have a right to say “no” when the time proves right.

b.      Obey His Law- this directly co-relates to the aforesaid point.

c.       Acquire wisdom- Without intention to turn any Christian into the rebellious type; one must seek wisdom in knowing how to handle “tight” situations as they arise. For instance, your employer requests that you set up a Facebook account under your name and add Jane, a colleague to your friends’ lists. Your employment contract specifies that no employee is to participate in any form of defamation of any other colleague or superior, and your employer has suspicions about Jane and needs these suspicions clarified. Even worse, Jane is your best friend. What do you do? Well first, examine what the word says about gossiping and back-biting in (Romans 1:28-32), which is what such event could lead to, because your employer may begin to confide in you about his thoughts towards Jane and asks your honest opinion about her.
     There are many options in opposing the “offer” like: turning it down; speaking to your employer about the detriments of his actions on abolishing relationships with his employees; or highlighting the inconsistency of such act with your job description as defined in the employment contract or with the code of integrity adopted by the organization. If he threatens your job, then you can take it to higher, relevant authority that can deal with the matter accordingly.

d.      Respect Authority- in spite of the “severity” of the offense you have committed or were persuaded to commit; NEVER be disrespectful towards authority for its actions or even, attitudes or character. Follow the biblical principles all times (Exodus 22:28).

e.       Walk in love- Yes, people may lie on you, hurt you or even fire you for standing up for your beliefs- it is still no excuse to hate them or wish revenge upon another’s life. This also has to do forgiveness (check out my previous blog on these guidelines). Not even Jesus hated those who drove the nails through His hands and feet, beat, spat on and lied about him. He loved them all as if they were without fault. Why can’t you do the same for one who has committed a lesser offense? Remember, even you have insulted someone by your actions and would therefore require forgiveness and love. They best “revenge” you can get is to love your offender and release him/her. Prayer can help you achieve love. If you’re unclear as to love’s definition, refer to the ever popular 1 Corinthians 13.

SMALL NOTE TO THE READER

In practice, certain tests are not passed 100% on first occurrence- I speak from experience- but consistent prayer and commitment to living godly should change the heart’s condition and thus our actions/ reactions towards situations around us. Even before this, repentance for erroneous actions should be a priority- admit to God your mistakes, ask for forgiveness and instruction on how to handle such situation when it occurs (however disguised) the next time around.

~Everything that you do, do it as if it were onto God~

References

Bill of Rights. (2011, October 11). Retrieved October 22, 2012, from http://www.constitution.org/billofr_.htm

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[1] Namely political; social care; arts and entertainment; media; organizational; judicial; family; military; educational; thought; spiritual and entrepreneurial as per Bishop Andre Thomas, brainchild behind the 12leadersmovement.comwebpage

Practical Steps to Forgiveness

Forgiveness- the word that seems so easy to look at but so hard to do; however www.freedictionary.com settles for the following definitions:

1.      “To excuse for a fault or an offense; pardon,

2.      To renounce anger or resentment against or

3.      To absolve from payment of (a debt, for example).”

I know that we continually experience situations which require pardon towards others for actions- however unimaginable- towards us or people close to us. It is especially true when we expect the same from others. With that said, of course, there remain numerous scenarios in which the “forgive” or “forgiveness” is mentioned in the Word. One particular scripture which places such emphasis rests with the Parable of the Unforgiving Debtor found in Matthew 18:21-22:

²¹ Then Peter came to him and asked, “Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?”

²² “No, not seven times,” Jesus replied, “but seventy times seven!

How impractical it sounds! I mean- Really!?! Well one way of avoiding detrimental ails to the spiritual self thus causing possible difficulty in drawing closer in relationship to Christ is to LET IT (the issue) GO before it takes deep root in your heart making it harder to overcome as time progresses. (Think of a 50 year old tree- no matter how many times you cut it at the truck, it will continually grow because it roots are deeply planted in the soil stretching further beyond unimaginable boundaries. The only way to permanently void the perpetuation of this tree is to uproot it ENTIRELY). However, I present to you further practical, biblical keys to FORGIVENESS as afforded by Pastor Gregory Dickow (trust me, it works!):

1. Believe that God can turn the situation around

2. Give up your right to be bitter      (Hebrews 12:13-15)

3. Do to fight back        (1 Peter 2:20)

4. Be patient- the willingness to endure what has been done to me without retaliation and without giving up

5. Pray     (Job 42:10)

"Forgiveness unlocks the door to your blessing. Forgiveness is the gateway to your miracle”- Pastor Gregory Dickow

YOU WIN!

 To the Christian:

If you believe or feel like your life is in shambles,

Take a look at the man whose life is scarred and tormented in sign

All welcomed with open arms, for their eyes see delight

The flesh contests no war 

Because of the choice to pursue after temporal artifacts

To them, living in sin is the new "IN"

But they're too blind to see they did not win- the gods of this world did

So to the struggling Christian, keep pressing towards the mark of excellence

When You feel like giving in because it seems like you only harbored in vain

Take a look at the sinner and realize that YOU WIN

When the drunkard abuses his common-law spouse:

YOU WIN because God saved you from that mess!

When the drug addict hits the streets- homeless- searching desperately for another sniff: 

YOU WIN because God did not let you drink out of a drain reeking with moldy water

Instead He gave you shelter and saved you from that mess!

When you see a promiscuous woman hogging the block, anticipating the arrival of a man that she may call her lover 

Because all she wants is security but all he wants is her body and so- the exchange begins:

YOU WIN because God fills a hole that no earthly being an fill and His love comes without compromising your body filthily

 

YOU WIN! Yes YOU, YOU WIN!

When the teenage mother cries out because her child is hungry and she regrets the "result" of her one-night stand

Oh how she regrets, that her life is put on hold just so her money can be consumed by her seed

YOU WIN because God granted you His salvation and grace in the nick of time!

All you need to do is have faith and let Him do the rest- He will direct your path

YOU WIN! Because you did not die 

YOU WIN! Even when the pain makes you cry

YOU WIN! Through your shifting He will restore new life

YOU WIN! YES, YOU WIN! And if you for a moment do not for a moment believe in this theme-

Imagine trading places with a soul already tasting the fires of hell!

YOU WIN! So just give Him praise 

YOU WIN! YOU WIN! Yes You- YOU WIN!