A Father's Gentle Nudging

Draw near to me

All who are weary and heavy burdened

And I will give you rest 

I will be your source of comfort

Peace

Strength

For all of your days

Draw near to me, oh sons and daughters!

And find your place in me once again

Return to Me- Your first love and keeper of your soul

And I will hold you-

Protect you from the snares of the evil one

Remember the victory is already won

Don’t you desire to be with the victor Himself?

And no longer walking in fear?

Return to me and I will give you rest

Return to me and I will keep you

Return to me and my love

And I will be all you need

LOST AND FOUND: THE SEARCH FOR CHRIST

How long have you been searching?

How long have you been looking for the risen King?

You searched the grave, (but) didn’t see Him there

Searched the world, (but) still you didn’t find him there?

 Why did you given in, admitting defeat?

He must be somewhere...

You’ve asked the watchmen but they fell asleep

You’ve inquired of the palace guard and they too have taken leave of their post

They’ve missed Him... But must you too?

Keep searching!

In the still of the night, the whisper of the wind gently caressing the contours of your face

Urging you to AWAKE!

For it is now clear: He is RISEN!

In your heart dear child,

Where there ought to be garrisons of His armies guarding-

Preserving the locks of (this) life’s wellsprings[1] from wastage

Yes! He lives!

Don’t you hear it too?

His voice as gentle as the wind, calling you closer

Deeper

Higher

He dwells there, in the deep recesses of your spirit

The fullness of your heart

Oh dear child, search no more

For the answer to the mystery has been unveiled:

He lives! Yes He lives!

But He longs to live in you... Will you let Him?

He lives and His heart beats in you

So search no further for He is risen

And He calls you to live for Him

Finally I have found the answer and He is Jesus

The lover of my soul

The keeper of my life

He is truly risen and lives in me

And because He lives in me-

I live

I breathe

I have life (beyond life itself)

Because He lives in me

I can breathe life into dead bones calling all to live once more-

Live once more for the honor and glory of Christ the King

He lives! Surely He lives!

My eyes have beheld the His glory

The lamb upon the throne who reigns for eternity!

---

[1] Proverbs 4:23

Forgive Me (For Neglecting God’s Word In My Actions)

“⁴ Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; ⁵ does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; ⁶ does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; ⁷ bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)”

Forgiveness starts with me and this I know and I believe

The words I have spoken generated pain,

Through the harshness or brutality in which it was unleashed

I had to sit back after releasing this venom

The poison in my veins seemed to leave me stained- lost- maybe even confused,

As to how I became this way and the source of this sting

I realized that it began with me

And it is from within me, in allowing the filth of the atmosphere to be breathed into the very breath of my lungs

And it is with all that I have and am I ask for your forgiveness

For the times when I know I could have spoken to you better

Soothingly, as if cooing to a babe- speaking in love so that the point could be drawn

To the point where the words no longer hurt, instead they are enveloped in love

Did I know better? Yes I did!

But I allowed the fears of failure, the pillars of my selfish pride and the unabashed glories of frustration grip my soul

And all I seemed to do was scream; when all I really wanted to do was to make you see

(That) All that I long to do or say is to ensure that you- my family- are safe from harm

Where all chains of brokenness and callousness and destroyed

And the hand of God can soar in the unthinkable way as only He can work

Instead I became like the beast himself…

Forgive me, for I lacked patience in understanding that I was made to endure and preach Christ to you, through every  possible avenue

Forgive me for I allowed my actions to deflect His and my character to permit you to question His work in me- in us

Forgive me Lord even more, for never intended to divert your people’s hope in you into that of the world

It is on this day I ask for utmost restoration and forgiveness

Teach me to love selflessly and unconditionally like Christ Your Son, my Savior

All the while understanding that I too am still your child and I ought to speak to Your children- my brothers and my sisters- in utmost respect, love and understanding

Teach me to have Your eyes and ears and to speak ONLY with Your mouth

Teach me to walk in all of Your precepts and ways from this day onward

Though I may fail, may I be quick to realign my path to Your Holy Way

Most importantly teach me to walk according to Your will, with Your character and armor girding me like a shield from the frivolous attacks of the spiritual dark forces

But to you I say again;

Please forgive me for I have acted insecurely towards you

Please forgive me for I spoke not with His love breathing through the words

Forgive me… for being human is no excuse to hurt you.

My Heart's Cry

There is none other like the love that I have found in Christ, 

Now I am desperate to drown in the astounding rushing wind of His grace. 

I am desperate..... to feel the arms of a King so embracing this prodigal daughter, 

welcoming her back home after straying away for so long. 

I am desperate..... to hear his voice, soothing to a crying baby’s aches, saying “I love you and will never forsake you.” 

Yes, His voice is clearly spoken through His word, but I long to hear His voice within the deep recesses of my spirit. 

I long for Him.... to draw from the deepest of deeps, soaring into the highest of highs. 

I KNOW this phase is only temporary, a sign of a higher level that must be attained in Him, 

a place where I shall be elevated beyond the natural capacity and understanding. 

Yet still, whilst I await the passing of this desert storm, this valley of life’s unbroken road; 

I cannot help but to realize and admit that I need more of my God. 

More of His love and His power, more of His ability and glory. 

I need the arms of my Father for I am lost without it. 

I need my Father’s arms for it is there that I find rest. 

I am desperate…… for more of my Jesus, my King. 

I am desperate for His love and life once again. 

Fresh fire- breathe on me and set me free from the sorrows and pains of this world, 

away from the concepts and brokenness of this society’s chains. 

Breathe on me that I may have life like never before. 

I am desperate Lord…… and only You can mold me into who I ought to be.

A Woman of God

Woman of God, her life is in the Potters’ hands

Woman of God, prefers no one else but Him who makes her whole

Woman of God, knows His word & holds it in her heart

Woman of God, practicality strengthens spoken words

That is who You want me to be,

A woman after Your own heart,

You want me to be: A WOMAN OF GOD

Designed With You In Mind: Present Training Grounds for Future Endeavors

 “Grrr! Why does it have to be this way? Lord I really want …….. (insert your request here). I have prayed to you tirelessly about this, why O Lord has it not been granted unto me? Speak to me Lord, just one word to let me know where I stand in the midst of this storm of life. Where is my breakthrough? Lord I am growing weary of the wait, for my strength seems to have failed me yet another day. Is there any end to this? Have I not been faithful to Your word, tarrying and enduring? When Lord, when? How Lord, how? When and how will this all turn around the way I desire it to? I guess it’s back to praying and waiting once again……”

I am sure you can relate to this monologue, whether voiced via thoughts (internally) or words (externally). I know I certainly can! Honestly, the course of life suited to our individual specifications and personal situations can be daunting and frustrating. Often times in meditation and reflection of times past, I have found myself pouring out to God; my desires to see visible changes in my environment, especially through my talents and abilities. Tears imprinted my visage’s canvas out of the inner frustration and exhaustion of simply desiring better through God-centered quests and accomplishments, only to have them unrealized.

In spite of all this, one thing always remained and God always seeks to remind me: “Embrace your NOW, for it serves as training grounds for your future. DO NOT DESPISE where you are today.” Wow! Talk about acquiring (and continually so) new eyes! Simply put, He was stating, focus not on the problem but rather focus on the solution. Of course, He was, is and always will be the solution to our issues but He also seeks to offer a practical methodology towards easier and bearable livelihood. Two scriptures standing out to me, relative to these statements are Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope” and Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.” (NKJV)

All this “talking” is as fleeting as the wind, without proper illustration. Hence I expound on this life lesson. In reading prior inserts in this blog, you may have received a brief insight as to certain occurrences in my life- most notably the death of my mother at the age of 16. For quite a few years I struggled to understand, the significance of this in my present life, but as the days roll by, the picture’s blurriness and distortion is being corrected to my vision.

A beautiful part of the 2014 era is the obvious road to Godly covenant (marriage) opened to me. With the time’s progression, a deeper appreciation for things that I learnt in the years past remains evident as it is now a second nature. In these ten years subsequent to her demise, the training and journey to becoming a wife began. Learning to care for my family’s needs (i.e. physical, emotional, spiritual), more for specifically the males; and household/ family management, was and remains pivotal. Have I mastered it? A greater part of me longs to say yes, but truthfully I have learnt to embrace and change with change. Continually with these changes I seek balance, where the right persons/ things get appropriate attention and in that precise context- nothing or no one is left out. This goes with the understanding that within time persons present and responsibilities change; some may remain and other may not- in all wisdom one needs to know which ones to let go of and which ones to hold onto; know each’s seasons and purpose in your life.

Also important, were/are the lessons drawn about myself- who I am and who I am destined to become in Christ; ensuring that God continually changes me for His glory (2 Cor. 3:18). Not forgetting above all, coming to the understanding that without Christ at the helm, my life would have no meaning and my bones would’ve probably taken up residence with worms and ants six feet beneath already, had I not found and accepted Christ when I did.

I could effortlessly list so many other aspects of my upbringing that have shaped me for this present moment, especially where love (for God, self and others), patience and faith were molded but I trust this illustration is enough to stand in this simple encouragement: “EMBRACE YOUR NOW and allow it to train you for your future as God sees fit. Further down the road, you may look back and be totally appreciative of your training grounds and the lessons drawn from there.” REMEMBER: No one is fully qualified for a job unless training and tests are undertaken and deemed successful.

Stay encouraged; focused on God irrespective of your situation. You are even closer to your breakthrough than you think. Press On! (Philipians 3:14)

HER STORY....Symptoms of a Misdiagnosis

The blood of her guilt, her transgression- stained her body as if dipping into the ocean's fullness and exemplifying a water-soaked glory.

Her face told the story of a prodigal woman who came home by night to the comfort and safety of her parents' house,

And by day returned to the drug infused street corners searching desperately for the comfort/ shrouding of the wall's embrace.

If only these walls could talk- what would they say? What would YOU say?

And now the crime of her rebelliousness rests evidently upon her.

She deserves it! 

It's about time she fell in her own mess so that she could finally desire change!

They have been speaking to her too long and she refused to obey... so it had to take the hand that rocked the cradle to break its stride, trip and fall....

O how they whispered and spoke quickly- judging the outcome but what about them? 

If they are so swift to cast judgement upon her, why can't they first perform an introspective and realize their own shunning prodded her deeper into this dark territory?

So many mornings as she departed from her home, she searched for a friend because she felt led by God to seek tangible assistance.

She visited the very place where proclamations of His presence burst forth  from the springs, 

but their eyes remained closed as if in high praise and their ears shut as if so in tune to His spirit- so great, so intense, 

that she felt instead, the sharp pangs of their rejection.

Never once did they acknowledge her mere "hello, I need help and I need a friend". 

If "they" were so engrossed in His Holy presence why didn't they hear Him directing/ordering them to care for her? 

That His daughter, the seed of His loins required tangible love from another seed? 

Or is it that they heard His voice but disobeyed because they saw her as an illegitimate child?

But now how can they even see the fruit of her actions is an adverse reaction to the faulty medication they gave? 

Now  that she is exposed and infected with this USTD (Un-sanctified Transmitted Disease), will they carry out more tests and give a proper, fitting diagnosis and prescription.... the perfect antidote of their love?